When we extended our secondment for an extra year, I wrote a blog post about the things I enjoyed in the U.K., and the things I missed from the U.S. Now that the secondment is complete, I decided that my final blog post would switch the lens. Here are the things that I miss about the U.K., and the things that I appreciate about the U.S.
I Miss about the U.K.
Melbourne Town Band
MTB was an unexpected chance to pick up my trombone after several years of dormancy. The extra year in the UK was a chance to see and admire how the members of MTB work diligently to stay involved in the fabric of Melbourne's activities. The highlights are still the Remembrance Day parades in 2014 and 2015 (here's the 2014 Remembrance Day Parade post). Now that I'm gone, I can confess to the cyberspace world that I would sometimes come to rehearsal late because I stood outside on the sidewalk and listened to the band play. I miss that. I don't miss the director's terrible jokes during the concerts. Here is my farewell blog post to the band.
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| 2014 Remembrance Day Parade |
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| I almost leveraged the extra year with MTB into permanent ownership of this B-flat bass |
Cycling
The commute was a normal part of my routine during the extra year. As the days in the office grew increasingly busy (I'm not sure how assigning one team to build, test, and certify two engines at the same time is anywhere near sane; and I've got a ton of respect for the colleagues who've made a career out of doing this), the rides through the countryside became increasingly important to my mental health. I don't have words or pictures that do justice to the beauty of the south Derbyshire countryside.
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| View of the countryside on my final cycling commute home |
The biggest cycling highlight for me was watching Charis and Clare learn to ride on two wheels. This brought family cycling, something I said I was looking forward to in the U.S., into our U.K. routine. The Saturday morning rides with the girls, followed by breakfast at The Crewe & Harpur, Jack's, or Melbourne Tea Rooms, are treasured memories.
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| Beginning of secondment |
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| End of secondment |
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| Beginning of secondment |
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| End of secondment |
"Shawn, we have an opportunity for you to go on secondment to Derby. Are you interested?"
"That depends. Do they have a good martial arts school?"
the discussion above did not happen
"Shawn, now that your secondment is complete, what do you miss most?"
"The karate club where the girls and I trained is pretty high up on the list."
the discussion above has happened several times
Here's a longer blog post about SDKA. |
| 2014 - Charis was most definitely not scary |
2016 - She may not be any scarier, but she's a much more competent martial artist
Walking
Like cycling, this became part of our normal routine. Saturday morning - let's walk the half mile into the village and pick up fun bread at the bakery. Holiday - let's go out for a walk. We did several family walks on our 2016 outings. One highlight was the girls' ability to make it through two chilly days of long walks during our trip to Edinburgh (blog post is here).
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| Treasured hiking memory - Norway |
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| Mt. Snowdon - the girls demonstrate their increased ability to go for walks |
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| Treasured hiking memory - Kristine revisits the West Highland Way |
Countryside in south Derbyshire
I got to cycle through it. Kristine got to jog through it. We got to walk in the midst of it as a family. And we got to drive through it any time we left our house in Melbourne. We miss it very much.
I got to cycle through it. Kristine got to jog through it. We got to walk in the midst of it as a family. And we got to drive through it any time we left our house in Melbourne. We miss it very much.
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| Calke Abbey was a 5 min drive from our house, and one of our favorite places to hang out |
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| South Derbyshire countryside, as seen from my bike |
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| Cloud Trail cycle path |
Travel
This moves up the list because we spent less time learning how to travel, and much more time enjoying the experience of traveling. In fact, several blog posts about trips during the past year reflect that theme of "Wow, we can do this peacefully."
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| Self-entertaining daughters on the plane |
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| Our trip to Norway was enabled by the extended secondment |
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| Family milestone - hanging out and enjoying time together in the airport instead of gritting teeth and waiting for the trip to be over |
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| Our trip to Spain was enabled by the extended secondment |
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| We got to visit St. Andrews, where Kristine spent a year as a student |
Church
I won't repeat what I said about St. Giles Anglican Church in my previous blog post. The differences I found beneficial are the ones that I miss now: the centrality of children in the service, exposure to the global community of faith through hymn writers from around the world, and creative use of film and drama. I also miss playing my recorder during communion, and being told after the service that "that was a lovely clarinet."
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| Photo of the Tardis gets repeated, just because it's a Tardis in church |
Yes, I miss it. No, I don't believe that I moved my family to the UK only for the Marmite). Yes, we stockpiled a large inventory that returned to the U.S. in suitcases of several friends and family members. No, I did not buy the Marmite cycling jersey (yes, that is a regret).
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| We interrupt our normally nostalgic blog post for an even more nostalgic photo |
2016 has seen lots of discussion in both the U.S. and U.K. about different paradigms addressing the question of what it means to live as part of a broader world. I'm not going to make any statements in favo(u)r of a particular paradigm here, but I will say that the discussion is an important one. I appreciated the daily reminders of being part of a broader world that the multiple nationalities and accents provided in the Derby office.
Little Red Ka
The Golf got the nod in the mid-point post. The Ka gets the nod in this one. For me, it was the only chance in my life that I'll get to own a micro-car. For the girls, somehow it became the preferred mode of transport (despite analog gauges, mechanical locks and windows, and only fitting two of them in the back). |
| Melancholy farewell as the Ka was taken to the junkyard |
I mentioned this in the blog post about our house. I said I would miss it when we left the U.K. I do miss it.
Narrow, Windy Roads
I miss the sense of accomplishment that comes with learning to handle them. I don't miss some of the encounters with oncoming traffic that occurs on them.
I miss the sense of accomplishment that comes with learning to handle them. I don't miss some of the encounters with oncoming traffic that occurs on them.
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| We learned not to panic at these encounters, but the hair on our necks never stopped rising |
I know the joke about hell being where all the cooks are British. It's not entirely true anymore, thanks to a renewal movement of making proper food in the U.K. that began a few years before our secondment.
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| Kristine learned to make Yorkshire pudding. It's on our wish list to make in the U.S. |
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| Sorry, but bratwurst are just not the same as real sausages |
I Enjoy about the U.S.
Time with Family
The freedom to travel during holidays is a blessing. The ability to be with family during formative events is also a blessing. Most of my siblings gathered in Chicago over Labor Day to celebrate my parents 40th wedding anniversary. I got to meet my nephew for the first time during that gathering. We were in Indianapolis when Kristine's niece was born. My brother and I spent a couple days in Minneapolis helping my parents clear out clutter in their house. These are all things that we couldn't do from the other side of the Atlantic. |
| 40th anniversary celebration for my parents |
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| I know you're my cousin, but you don't really expect me to share my yogurt, do you? |
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| Happy auntie (with sleeping baby) |
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| Happy cousins (with sleeping baby) |
Folk Music Sessions
I never successfully made this work in the U.K., even though I returned to the U.S. with a whole lot more instruments than I left with. I've greatly enjoyed reconnecting with the musical community in Indianapolis.
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| Hammered dulcimer at the Bent Rail Brewery weekly session |
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| Fylde mandolin family instruments that returned to the U.S. with me |
I told my friends in MTB that I anticipated my trombone going back into storage in the basement. They told me not to give up hope of continuing to play. Sure enough, a Google search for brass ensembles in Indianapolis revealed that the Indy Trombone Choir formed in early 2016 and rehearses at Butler University, just a few blocks from our home. These guys are excellent musicians. They are also friendly, welcoming, and tolerant of my being an amateur.
Jingle Bones is an Indianapolis tradition I didn't know about until this year. The Indy Trombone Choir plays at about the 1:15 mark.
Snow
This is still on the girls' list. They loved the first snow we had in December. They were very disappointed when tropical temperatures melted it all by Christmas.
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| Unlike me, the girls enjoyed the snowfall in Melbourne at Christmas |
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| Our Indianapolis house after the first snow in December |
Family Cycling
The relocation literature consistently tells expats that it's unhealthy to blame a new location for not being the old location. Kristine and I have reminded each other of this. We have reminded the girls of this. It came to a head for me with the first couple of bicycle outings in Indianapolis. As I vented my frustration at everything that is not like the rides I did with the girls in Melbourne, Kristine rightly took me to task. "Indianapolis is not Melbourne, Shawn, and it never will be. You need to experience these outings for what they are instead of for what they are not." In the grand scheme of things, channeling re-entry frustration into something relatively benign like cycling is not a bad way to work through the rejection stage of culture shock. We're making progress. Good Morning Mama's has filled the role of fun place to eat breakfast. Their pancakes and omelets are becoming the fun outing food that the English breakfasts used to be. I'm hopeful for this routine to grow further in 2017.
The relocation literature consistently tells expats that it's unhealthy to blame a new location for not being the old location. Kristine and I have reminded each other of this. We have reminded the girls of this. It came to a head for me with the first couple of bicycle outings in Indianapolis. As I vented my frustration at everything that is not like the rides I did with the girls in Melbourne, Kristine rightly took me to task. "Indianapolis is not Melbourne, Shawn, and it never will be. You need to experience these outings for what they are instead of for what they are not." In the grand scheme of things, channeling re-entry frustration into something relatively benign like cycling is not a bad way to work through the rejection stage of culture shock. We're making progress. Good Morning Mama's has filled the role of fun place to eat breakfast. Their pancakes and omelets are becoming the fun outing food that the English breakfasts used to be. I'm hopeful for this routine to grow further in 2017.
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| If we look chilly, it's because the temperature was -4 deg F |
Academic Writing
In the midst of the frenzy of activity that was working on the Trent 1000-TEN and Trent 7000 certification programmes (you're welcome, if you're a U.K. reader), I found myself re-engaging with with Organizational Behavior literature that I hadn't touched in a few years. The return to the U.S. has provided opportunities to flesh these ideas out further, bothin within the Rolls-Royce office in Indianapolis, and in broader discussions. Whether this turns into anything substantive ("Shawn, you've lived for a long time in the engineering and anthropology worlds. I bet if you wrote a book, it would sell like hotcakes.") remains to be seen, but it's been fun to interact with the ideas again.
In the midst of the frenzy of activity that was working on the Trent 1000-TEN and Trent 7000 certification programmes (you're welcome, if you're a U.K. reader), I found myself re-engaging with with Organizational Behavior literature that I hadn't touched in a few years. The return to the U.S. has provided opportunities to flesh these ideas out further, bothin within the Rolls-Royce office in Indianapolis, and in broader discussions. Whether this turns into anything substantive ("Shawn, you've lived for a long time in the engineering and anthropology worlds. I bet if you wrote a book, it would sell like hotcakes.") remains to be seen, but it's been fun to interact with the ideas again.
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| It make perfect sense to connect the parable of the sower with a value proposition for anthropology and engineering, don't you think? |
Apple Picking
Another relocation literature tenet is that when you move to a new place, you need to get out and experience the things in that place that are beautiful. Before we left on secondment, picking apples with a toddler and 5-year old was an experience to be endured (because the apples are worth it), but not enjoyed (because we had a toddler and 5-year old in tow). Three years later, the girls pull their own wagons, pick their own apples, and interact in ways that make it an overall much more enjoyable experience. This would have happened anyway, but we probably wouldn't have appreciated it as much.
Another relocation literature tenet is that when you move to a new place, you need to get out and experience the things in that place that are beautiful. Before we left on secondment, picking apples with a toddler and 5-year old was an experience to be endured (because the apples are worth it), but not enjoyed (because we had a toddler and 5-year old in tow). Three years later, the girls pull their own wagons, pick their own apples, and interact in ways that make it an overall much more enjoyable experience. This would have happened anyway, but we probably wouldn't have appreciated it as much.
I'm enjoying being a non-conformist with the treats traditions in the office. Why bring donuts when you can bring pretzels (sorry, Drew, if you're reading this)?
Working Faucets
The novelty of controlling temperature from a single faucet that actually works has not yet worn off.
The novelty of controlling temperature from a single faucet that actually works has not yet worn off.
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| Oh, so luverly havin' all my temperature controlled ... |
And so, the blog comes to an end
I make sense of the world by writing. It's not surprising that this blog had many posts in 2014 when we were adjusting to the U.K., fewer posts in 2015 when we were focused on life there, and more posts in 2016 as we transitioned to life in the U.S. Putting this post together was an excuse to read back through posts from the 30 months of our assignment. I've enjoyed seeing how much our family has changed and grown. Truly it was an amazing adventure.
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| The secondment begins: walking in the Indianapolis Airport, January 2014 |
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| The secondment ends: walking at Glendalough, July 2016 (the last time we were here, Elise was in utero) |
